I need Focus...

I need Focus... a lot of them .... Just finished 2 local projects.... 1 awaiting and 1 ongoing.... For these past few months due to unrelated and overly stupid reason, I've been delayed. All my fault, the blame is on me.... Having trouble getting pass a line, it hinders everything in me.. It leaves me drained, stressed, tired and couldn't concentrate. I daydream a lot, lost in my quicksand of thoughts, I spent a lot of time hoping.. Hoping that everything will still go back to everything that was once been.. and then it smacked me in the head bigtime.. I'm losing my grasp on reality...

Although it may seem strange to me, just realizing it when everything goes awry and falling into different places, it's like a scythe in my neck.. I felt fear, fear of what I would become if I allow myself to be in such a situation. A situation that I'm pretty much sure I'm not the first one, and will not be the last one.

I need concentration, a lot of them, to completely be engulfed with my works, to finished everything and hope to get a lot more of them.. I'm glad I have this chance. So please, Oh Heaven don't let me F#@ked up for some stupid reason that shouldn't have deserved the time it was given in the first place....